break – I Write

Broken Glass

I had a dream. In the dream, I was carrying a glass filled with ice-water. I’m usually thirsty in real life if I’m dreaming this, but before waking up, I was bumped into by you know who. He was oblivious to the fact that I was standing right behind him with a glass in my hand. As he bumps into me, the glass falls, not quite shattered, but all the water spilled out of it.

I don’t remember being upset at him. It’s like I expected it. What is memorable is the image of me cleaning up the broken glass and holding up the glass and thinking. “You can’t drink out of a broken glass.” The glass is ruined.

I woke up sad, thirsty and unsatisfied. It was a fitting dream.

Careful …

Just when you think you’ve reached it, your stomach sinks, your dreams change,

Your eyes fill, your color fades.

Be careful.

Take care, remind yourself how far you’ve come.

Don’t let ’em knock you down.

Take a mental health break.

Be good to yourself when you’ve been punched yet again.

Remember, your scars aren’t visible. You hide them most days.

Remind those loved ones who care, that you need them.

It’s okay, be careful.

The opportunity

“Ho, ho, ho!” I don’t think that’s what a merry laugh really sounds like. I usually hear “Hah, hah, hah, snort, clap!” Maybe Santa was actually “Ho-ing”in an attempt at lifting all he had to carry this year? Maybe he wasn’t laughing at all??

But, seriously, Merry Christmas to you and Merry “other-holidays” to others.

I wish you well in these days that most agree come with a mixture of Merry-ness and all sorts of other “nesses”.

As the year comes to a close, I wish it farewell. Thankfully, it went fast! I’m trying not to dislike it and instead see it for what it is, an opportunity.

The opportunity to break. To finally reach a breaking point, to reach a sort of end and completeness. An”end” to things feels sucky and dark. But, the dark side’s power is a sham. As a matter of ~~fact~~, ~~belief,~~ faith, I think it has deep purpose.

I’m no expert. I’m no preacher, but I did watch some Star Wars movies. Old and new. The force is with us. (Look it up: mental and moral strength)

At some point, we can drag ourselves from this pit with the force, there waiting for us (if we want it) is the ever always heroes of: faith, hope and love.

And yes, the greatest of these is LOVE, but don’t discount FAITH and HOPE. These are BIG too. If needed, look at these as the branches of government. You get the idea.

Right now, if there is a sort of a dark power rising up in your life, step on the fucker with a foot of faith and hope. Even just a flicker will snuff out the power of the deadly red saber.

~May the FORCE be with you.

A small gift of time

It’s given to us generously and we often take it for granted until we find ourselves with a lack of it. We fill our time with this and that. We dream of desires to do this and that when we steal a bit of time for ourselves. But, often, we don’t even do those things. *Guilty*

We sweep the floor, we shop for gifts, hang the stockings, wash the clothes, etc., but am I remembering that even those busy times are still times that others wish they had. While we stay busy, others suffer a time they hadn’t asked for and resent what has been given. Holiday time shouldn’t be for mourning, crying, or sitting alone. It shouldn’t involve being cold, hungry or desperately addicted.

Be still and know that He is God and we are not. But we can be guides, messengers, and vehicles for his love and healing. Am I listening to the voice that says “Allow yourselves to be used. Speak words of kindness, encouragement and peace to others who need it.”

I’ll try. If nothing else is produced in me, then please God, let it be that I can bring peace to another, kindness, and above all, love.

~Peace.

Monday Again

So, here it is Monday again. The good news is that my husband and I woke up early and worked out, so no matter what happens for the rest of the day, I can scratch off a large item on the to do list, and if I don’t accomplish much else, then I’m still ahead 😉

The bad news? There really isn’t any for me and I’m grateful. I truly am. I’ve tried to keep this blog focused solely on writing, but honestly the events of the world effect everyone and everything and I just need to face that reality, pray, absorb some positive vibes and move forward.

Today, I’m trying to ignore the turkey tasks and impending cooking and cleaning and enjoy the time I have with my daughter who’s here from school. It’s nice to catch up on the life of a 19 year old college student. I’m also trying to stay true to my goals with blogging and writing a chapter a day. Have a great week amigos!

~peace to all.

Stuck

So, today, I realized that I’m stuck, but that it’s for a good reason. There’s a part of me that’s tired, exhausted. I’m not wanting any pity or sympathy; facts are facts. Tired people don’t produce as well as they could if they’re rested. Resting, exercising, making good food choices even “veg-ging” are all things that will help along with something else. Waiting.

Waiting isn’t the popular thing to do for people who enjoy producing. I just need to realize that being tired is a legit result of living through a lengthy emotionally driven time period.

It’s okay to take a break, a mental break, physical break, emotional break. It doesn’t have to mean the end of anything, but just a break in the action of life.

So, there it is. I’ll return when I can.