health – I Write

Careful …

Just when you think you’ve reached it, your stomach sinks, your dreams change,

Your eyes fill, your color fades.

Be careful.

Take care, remind yourself how far you’ve come.

Don’t let ’em knock you down.

Take a mental health break.

Be good to yourself when you’ve been punched yet again.

Remember, your scars aren’t visible. You hide them most days.

Remind those loved ones who care, that you need them.

It’s okay, be careful.

The last time I experienced so much snow around me was in Boise, ID with my daughter and today, I woke up to this in Seattle! It will probably melt soon it, but it’s a perfect “excuse” to sit in bed and write. It’s either that or go out and create a snow man of sorts. I did put on my very warm socks with the intention of taking some snow pictures later and taking a cold walk. We’ll see.

It’s also a great time for me to process some things. I think I seriously need to divulge because lately, my dreams are weirder than ever. I dreamed about mosquitos taking over a dish I was about to eat. I dreamed about a dog and how it killed an alligator that was in my bedroom and about trying to change a diaper and not being able to do it and last night about plants camouflaging to look like spiders!

So, I decided I needed to socially put this out there in hopes that it’ll alleviate some inner stress, face my struggles and hopefully help others who may be facing hard realities.

One thing. I am a true introvert and I don’t like to have attention drawn to me. So there’s that. And then my kids. First of all, they blow me away with their emotional intelligence. They have been open about their struggles and as a result, they face them head on while also (no doubt) helping those that struggle as they do and I’m encouraged to do the same thing.

So, I’ve been married for 24 years, but my marriage is ending and I’m separated. Even writing it down brings home it’s stark reality. But, strangely, writing about it also brings some peace. This is my very difficult reality and I’m not always together. People around me need to know why.

But, at the same time, I have healthy outlets and meaningful relationships. I also have a great therapist who I can see, if needed. I’m also a believer and so there’s the power of prayer. I have peace. But I still needed to be open with you.

My family, friends, readers. I need you and I value you. You are important in my life.

Thank you for allowing me this platform, this snowy day to truly update you.

~Peace and more peace….

Monday Morning

I had a case of “morn-somnia”, that is when you wake in the wee hours* of the morning and fail to go back to sleep, and so I thought I’d do a quick update and feel somewhat productive.

Okay, so the update:

Though I’m a writer at heart, and enjoy work in pj’s, I’ve pretty much launched myself headlong into the work-out-of-home arena. The good news? Well, there is the income thing, sure, but I think the w.o.o.h jobs have put some balance into my personality. I tend to withdraw from the world happily, and even though that’s nice for me, it does nothing to help the world at large. And in my opinion, the world at large needs every one of us to give of ourselves. So, like a good cup of coffee, each day, I attempt to pour myself out onto humanity to see what good I can help do. And if I can’t help, then at least, I have tried.

When I’m home, I try to recuperate so that I can then pour myself onto the people in my life that truly matter. All 5 of us were together for Thanksgiving and it was great to just be together and talk, eat and enjoy each other.

So, here it is Monday and it’s a new week. There is much to do, more to work on and love to pass along to others. I’m thankful.

~Peace.

Hmph, pancakes…

I’m saying that because yesterday I was gloating about having pancakes for lunch and then bam! My body reminds me that, yes, in fact, I am gluten sensitive. And no, I didn’t want to make gluten free pancakes, I wanted all american white flour (King Arthur’s), eggs (organic free range, butter (organic) and milk (almond milk), but no! My body said, “No white flour, period!”

So, as gluten sensitivity goes, you may guess where I spent some of my afternoon and I also poured my 3:00 p.m. glass of Pino back into the bottle. Yeah.

So, today, at the grocery store, I loaded up on gluten friendly flour, raw ginger (plain weird) and raw turmeric (weird “finger-looking” food). I’m focused on healthy bowel movements and a painless belly. And no worries, that same night, I poured myself a glass of healthy, antioxidant red wine. (Malbec)

In closing, this was not the post that had been bubbling up in me, but after yesterday, I don’t remember anymore what that may have been about. Such is life.

~Peace friends