What is Divorce?

Divorce is when you realize you can’t listen to certain songs anymore.

Divorce shatters holidays.

Divorce means having to accept death to a dream.

Divorce means watching your kids dreams die.

Divorce means wearing a “less than perfect” label around your neck.

Divorce means living life being stalked by the past.

Divorce is watching your ex shrink.

Divorce is an unraveling of a cord.

Divorce grieves God.

Divorce means starting again though some parts have died.

Divorce makes little sense to extended young family.

Divorce is one big sigh…

Divorce is exhausting.

Divorce is joining a party you didn’t wish to be invited to.

Divorce bites.

Divorce is an ugly word.

Divorce screams shame.

Divorce aims at your heart and celebrates the bullseye.

Divorce cocks the gun and shoots straight.

Divorce is sitting alone on a hill and it starts to rain.

Divorce makes it hard to smile.

Divorce pain is found in your eyes.

Though divorce ushers in a new beginning, the end keeps resurrecting.

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Melodious

I put the solo piano station on Pandora in order to progress through the pages of a novel, but instead of words, I envision alternate realities.

I’m a slender ballet dancer alone in the studio, practicing plies on the barre, but I could also just as passionately, be found in the lab, again alone, studying images of the brain in curious exploration.

I’m also an artist at work in the studio, again solo, lifting, smoothing, spreading and blending hues until they return to me colorful arrays.

More often than not, and to some, not as esteemed, the melodies conjure the memories. I’m giving baths, caressing a head, I’m reading while also enjoying the warmth of a small child pressing into my lap and in step with the tempo, I see the trio laughing, skipping, climbing and exploring.

I’m a mother.